Oops

It’s been a while since I started posting in this blog, another one of my hobbies that lasted approximately five minutes. Quite a few things have changed in the last year, a whole bloody lot actually. I’m not quite sure where to start.

The main thing to note is that I’ve completed my first year at uni studying creative writing. If I’m being honest I did focus less on the academic side of my year and instead convinced myself that making friends and memories is more important. Anyway, you only need 40% to pass first year right? Fortunately, this mentality didn’t screw me over too much, as I’ve managed to get through all of my assignments with results I’m proud of. I’m actually finding it hard to get to grips with the fact that in less than a month I’ll be moving into the house I’m living in for second year.

For now I’m in the same position as I was when I started this blog, trying to fill my summer with adventures to kill all of this spare time on my hands, as well as searching for jobs. One thing which will (hopefully) aid me in both of these is the fact that I finally have my car insured and on the road. I’ve been a driver for a grand total of 4 days now and already never want to set foot in the tiny train station in my village ever again.

Another topic which I’ve posted about here before is art. I’m still struggling to find my style but I think I might be getting there? I want to start posting art updates here, maybe some sketchbook tours? We’ll see how far I get.

Maybe see u again this time Summer 2018 xo

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Stacked

I’ve been part of the Marlowe Senior Company for a year and a half now, having joined in January 2015. With no previous experience in extracurricular drama groups or activities out of school in general, it took me a while to be able to call myself a part of the group, not just technically but as one of the people I would have previously envied, already having friends and easily making connections with newcomers. By July 2015, I had myself a group of friends with whom I could fully thrive off of last year’s community project, The Rights of Others. In the past year my relationships with these friends have only grown, and before I knew it I had reached my final ten-week term with my group.

The show this year was performed on the main stage at the Marlowe, whereas previous performances have graced the smaller stage at the theatre, the Studio. The production was the largest community theatre project in the country, with over 24o participants of a wide age range. With such a large cast, it came as no surprise that significant roles would be limited, so some continuity would be felt in the play. Having not gained a place in the ensemble cast, I joined the rest of my company who had only a few lines each and joined in telling the tale of two young immigrants around which the story is focused.

We performed on the 13th and 14th of July, and many of us had fears about the sheer number of seats we were required to sell in order to accommodate such a large venue. When the first performance rolled around and we had yet to get through a full dress rehearsal with the enormous cast, many of us were worried about how the first night would be. There were some minor issues and an incident involving some awol nuns, but all in all we were informed that we had positive feedback from our audience (unless,of course, our director was simply trying to calm our nerves for the next performance). The second performance was a major improvement in my eyes, or from what I was able to see from the wings waiting to do my scenes.

The cast party in the pub across the road from the theatre in which most of the play was set was the best way to end my time at the Marlowe. Most of my friends were not actually there as many of the group are underage and couldn’t see the point in going to a pub not to drink, but those who were there are cherished friends nonetheless and the spirit of the evening was victorious and celebratory.

It is with a heavy heart that I leave the Marlowe Senior Company. I only wish that I had heard of it sooner and joined years ago, as the time has flown so quickly and I just don’t feel ready to go yet. I know that the friends I have made are not exclusive to a weekly two-hour workshop though, and I am grateful for having these people in my life.

 

ps. if any of those friends read this then I give you permission to punch me for being so sappy in a blog post.

Style

This is more of a thought than a summary of something interesting I’ve done. I have found myself on countless youtube channels in the past few weeks of artists who’s styles I admire, watching a number of videos titled “how to find your style” or something similar. Style is an interesting concept. It makes us who we are and it is what allows us to be recognised at a glance. As an artist (something I refer to myself as now since a friend referred to me as one in the smoking area of a club once) I am very conscious of the fact that I don’t think I have a style yet. I am self-taught and only really beginning with my art, so I think that I can be forgiven but I am impatient with myself and as a result, I am frustrated that I am not able to conjure up characters and designs in my mind. I am unable to provide my Instagram dedicated to my art with any sense of consistency or distinctiveness as I am still experimenting. I am okay at copying, I can draw someone in the style of someone else, I can do a fairly decent realistic portrait. But I have no clue what to do in order to provide a theme in my art, something which I can be proud to call my own. I understand that this will probably come with time and I will most likely just have to keep creating and looking for inspiration until one day I realise I am using similar techniques and giving characters continuous characteristics and I will have something to call my own. However, I am the most impatient person I know. I expect myself to be good at everything, to be able to master any skill in record time and when I find myself unable to do that I get frustrated and write myself off as a failure. I suppose I just have to wait until I can look back at this and remember fondly this ridiculous impatience.

I fear that this issue will also present itself within my writing. I’m scared that there are no original ideas, no stories for me to imagine, no new worlds to craft in great detail and dedicate myself to. If I read a piece of work I have written I can tell that it’s mine, but that is more of an example of my personal idiolect than my style. Again I suppose the answer is practice, but I can’t help but wonder if anyone else has these fears.

Stacy.

Introductions

I’m awkward at introductions. I make a mess of first impressions. But I’m going to try and put that behind me to try my best at explaining what I’m doing here. I finished school last month and finished my exams shortly after. Ever since I have existed in a world of sleeping until the afternoon, walking my nan’s dog (who’s presence we have been graced with for about five weeks now), and napping until dinner time. This miserable existence is occasionally punctuated by trips to Canterbury with friends and attending my youth theatre group, but there’s not much else. I want to do more with my time. I’m looking for a job so that each day won’t feel like a terrible waste and I’m trying my best to make art as often as possible, but I want to do things of note also and I want to have somewhere to collect the memories of these adventures and look back with fondness, or perhaps just as a reminder that I do know how to go out and actually do things. Where better to do that than a blog.

In an age where many will plan journeys purely depending on how many decent photo ops there will be (I am no exception to this, making my life look better than it actually is on Instagram is one of my guilty pleasures), I have decided to take advantage of this vanity and the necessity to write as my excuse for partaking in activities that lend themselves to a few nice snaps. Therefore if I go places with writing about and posting accompanying pictures in mind, I hope to be encouraged to live a more exciting life and spend my long summer doing things. 

In my brain this all makes sense but it is 00:41 and I am in bed about to go to sleep so if this is all incoherent nonsense and I fail to post again please do forgive me.

All the best, Stacy

 

ps. Just spent 5 minutes googling how to sign off a blog entry before realising how ridiculous I am as a human being.